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Steve Likes to Curse
Writing, comics and random thoughts from really a rather vulgar man
Pet Peeve: Leaving the dog in the car should be a guttable offense 
Saturday, April 26th, 2008 | 03:59 pm [personal, ranting]
Steve
The next time I find myself with nothing to do, I'm going to sit down and make a list of all the things I will do should I ever find myself fabulously wealthy and thus above the law.  At the top of this list:  Every time I see a parked car with an animal locked inside, I'm going to put my goddamn foot through the window, whether it's cracked an inch or not.  In fact, if I were a rich guy — or a cop — I'd pretty much just drive around putting my foot through cars with dogs in them all the time.

Last night Ashley and I went to the mall so I could buy myself a grossly overdue new pair of shoes.  Parked right across from me in the lot was a white Mercedes.  Inside that Mercedes was a hot and lonely dog, sitting in the front seat, watching out the window for any sign of his owner.  I said something to Ashley about how much that pissed me off, and we went inside to the Shoe Dept.

I almost got a pair of black Hush Puppies until I realized they had no tread on the bottom and would be no good for walking in the woods.  I found another pair more to my liking — black, leather, good tread, made in China and everything! — paid and we walked back outside.  At first it looked like the dog was gone.  I don't know what I thought, maybe that the owner had returned and had taken the dog out for a walk or something.  A second went by and I saw the dog sit up in the back seat of the Mercedes.  He must have resigned himself to his owner not coming back any time soon, and settled down for a nap.  I opened the passenger door to my truck for Ashley, and keyed the hood of the Mercedes on my way around to the driver's side.

It felt good, doing the wrong thing for the right reason.
Comments 
Monday, April 28th, 2008 | 11:47 am (UTC)
Anonymous
I catch you doing that and you will get an ass beating. People like you that damage other people's property need their neck stretched with a rope.
Monday, April 28th, 2008 | 12:59 pm (UTC)
Is that your way of admitting you leave your dog in your car? It's not as if I wander parking lots breaking windows and keying cars whenever I feel like it. People who leave their pets in their cars while they go shopping deserve a lot worse than a busted windshield or a scratch in the paint.
Monday, April 28th, 2008 | 02:27 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
Let me catch you doing it to my property and I will stomp a mud hole in your ass.
Monday, April 28th, 2008 | 03:19 pm (UTC)
Will you then walk it dry?
Monday, April 28th, 2008 | 02:04 pm (UTC) - Come on, Really
Anonymous
tough guy (http://s29.photobucket.com/albums/c260/v_opposition/?action=view&current=416px-Itg_quarterly.jpg)
Tuesday, April 29th, 2008 | 12:59 am (UTC)
Anonymous
But people who commit murder over minor property damage are A-okay!

I shudder to think what this person does to jaywalkers.

--Varjak
Tuesday, April 29th, 2008 | 11:05 am (UTC)
Anonymous
Only the government cares about jaywalkers. That is not a real crime like THEFT, PROPERTY DAMAGE, murder, rape, tresspass, etc.
Tuesday, April 29th, 2008 | 01:46 pm (UTC)
I like how you capitalize "THEFT" and "PROPERTY DAMAGE," while murder and rape get secondary mentions. Your measured, selfless view of the law is refreshing.

You forgot to mention ANIMAL ABUSE, by the way, which is what the original article was, like, you know, fucking about.
Thursday, May 1st, 2008 | 11:18 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I'm just curious, was it hot outside? Or were you just concerned about the dog's anxiety?
Thursday, May 1st, 2008 | 11:24 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
my apologies, just noticed the reference that he was "hot and lonely."
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